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Real Queens Fix Each Other’s Crowns

Queens are leaders, and every woman has the right to call herself a Queen. But Real Queens do not try to take down their fellow Monarchs. They create alliances to help each other be stronger together. They understand that in order to take credit for having power, they also have to take responsibility.

There is an incredible book I’ve read, called The Soul of Leadership, by Deepak Chopra. I highly recommend this read for all the powerful ladies out there.  My approach to what makes someone a good leader is absolutely inspired by this and many other pieces of writing. The compilation of The Soul of Leadership, other books, researching respected leaders throughout history, and evaluating qualities that lead to lasting and respected leaders have brought me to this place. I have found that respected leaders are compassionate, thoughtful, firm in integrity, think of the greatest good, and they are centered rather than being self-centered.

We are at a critical place in the evolution of humanity where we need Soulful Leadership more than ever. As a family of women, we are responsible to be “way showers”. Why are we responsible? Because why not! We have to step up. I have to step up. You have to step up. We always have an opportunity to lead, and as women we have so many amazing qualities that make us incredible leaders. We are vulnerable, we are thoughtful, we are strong with conviction, we are creative, we are fun, we are fierce. Let’s start putting these qualities to purpose. We can firstly be a leader to our self, and then to others. The number of people you lead is not so important but the strength of leadership you offer is. You can be a leader in ways that you may not even realize. You can lead in ways you don’t know have great impact. And the best way for us to start being better leaders is by lifting our self and then lifting others with us.

It’s time to move out of competition and into cooperation. Have we considered actually helping each other? Hello! Hmmm well that is an interesting thought. Maybe we’d get further and have better relationships. Competition to be #1 has run amuck, and life in our current culture, in general, has become cutthroat, competitive, self-serving, and in many ways just plain petty. We need examples of women who possess integrity, who are humble and believe in the greatest good of all. It would be so much more fun standing at the top of the mountain together, dressed in different colors, than trying to survive the rat race of only 1 wins.

While qualities of acting shallow, petty, vein exist, there is also a modern blossoming of unity, compassion, understanding and cooperative action. We see it in so many ways from women who march together, taken leadership positions in large companies & in government, women who are scientists, women who loudly fight for human rights, and women who quietly but stealthily embody love. It takes a village and it takes all kinds. We are all different but we all have that same space within us that says I AM. And that is truly the most powerful force of goodness driving us to be better. In the spirit of being different while also the same, let’s see how we can elevate the crown wearing process.

Start with YOU

  1. Check in with yourself: Take an honest look at who you are, how you act, what beliefs you carry. Evaluate what your life is about up to this point? What things do you value and put energy toward? Do you live with integrity? Do you treat yourself and others with compassion? Do you set boundaries where you need to? If you have been on the bitchy side of crown wearers… STOP. Forgive yourself and move forward with a better attitude.
  2. Eliminate Judgment of yourself and others: it only holds you back and keeps you in a cycle of insecurity and that is no place for a Queen.
  3. Forgive/Release/Get Centered: Not only is forgiving yourself important but in order to be a leader in life you need to work on forgiving others. This doesn’t mean you say what another did is okay. What it really means, is that you accept it happened and you are no longer willing to be affected in a negative way by whatever experience kept you in a smaller role. It is time to harness your power and live from an inspired place. This inspired and loving place is your center. Always return here.
  4. Set New Intentions: How can you elevate your life and others? What are your deepest desires and goals?
  5. Do what you intend to: like Nike says, “Just Do It”. This in one of the most important steps. Doing the work and following through is what makes the dream a reality. Without following through, a dream stays a dream. Do the work.
  6. Keep checking in and return to Center. We are human and that means we need to constantly check in with ourselves to see where we are. Are we staying in alignment with our deepest values? If not, return to center.

Empower Yourself. Empower Others. A few guidelines that Queen’s live by:

  • Instead of being Jealous over another’s success, let it be the universe showing you what is possible. Then for heaven’s sake, go create something perfect for you.
  • Not everything someone else has or is doing, is right for you.
  • You have unique gifts to offer. Enough said. Find out what they are and start utilizing them.
  • Fill in each other’s weaknesses with another’s strength. Give and Receive. Ask for help or support and offer the same in return.
  • For the highest good of all. And so it is!

Having the opportunity to live from a Soul Empowered place is truly a special choice to make. The quality of your life and others around you will be enriched tremendously. And it all starts with you. How can you start becoming a Queen for yourself? And remember that there are numerous ways to be a leader for others. It could resemble being a positive role model for a young girl or boy, showing kindness to someone who is struggling in their life. You can lead with your creativity by painting from your heart or lead by using social media for good. You don’t have to literally be Queen of England. But if you have a large goal in mind, go for it! And don’t forget that Real Queens fix Each Other’s Crowns.

— Breanne Jenay Benson
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